Setting Sail (Softly)
Hello reader,
It’s time.
I’m going to start writing my book.
Officially.
This blog will act as my accountability for what I’ve decided, for me to have something to look back (like a journal), and to generally share my experience with anyone who comes across this and reads it…
Welcome?
Anywho, like many peers my age who’s into reading and literature, I’ve decided to write a book.
Honestly, that statement as a whole has me feeling certain things.
“many peers” means the market is getting overcrowded
I’m slightly scared I might be judged as those riding the bandwagon(?)
(I’m not sure if that’s the correct term to use but hopefully what I’m trying to say gets across…)
With the second one, not saying that’s bad per say, but because of the popularity of some books series and the rise of the New Adult genre focused heavily in Romantasy, I know some will judge.
But regardless, I’m sure things are going to go well. I can’t start this journey with worries… I say after I’ve written my concerns down.
Ah!
Back on track:
I’ve always wanted to write a book but I didn’t really know what I wanted to write about. But now, I have an idea - a story idea, and I want to get it out there.
This story has been in my head for about 2 years. It’s not fully finished (even with the 2 years), I have no idea where the middle of part the story is, but I have a world I’ve built since I wanted to write, the main characters I want this story to revolve around, a strong theme / topic I want it to have. I also have a great beginning and a lot of good but scattered scenes.
They’ve been living in my imagination for a while, and I’ve written them down before but never truly had the courage to really sit down and write all of it out.
But to be very honest, one of the reasons why I didn’t write officially is because the story I have isn’t finished and that made me hesitate.
I did try to roughly start myself about 4ish months ago, finally put my idea in writing, but I have about 5-6 versions of it now… I keep changing the character situation, how I want it to start, or if this setting is correct for the beginning. What if I change or add another character? It’s a constant development situation still…
And when I watched some authors show their process of writing their book/books, it looked nothing - ABSOLUTELY nothing - like mine. They seemed to have everything in order and they seemed to have the whole story figured out. They had the character arcs planned, knew what the plot looked like: beginning, middle, and end, and had a whole map of all of it. And here I was, watching and listening, thinking none of this looks like what I have. I have a lot of incomplete stories. They have completed ones.
I still had plots and scenes scattered here and there, somehow all connected and not at all at the same time. It made me feel like Alice in Disney’s Alice in Wonderland where there are arrows pointing here and there confusing Alice where to go.
How I see myself trying to figure out which path I should take my plot.
And because of these differences that I saw, I thought ‘Oh maybe I shouldn’t write just yet’ or ‘I’ll development my idea more and then maybe start writing’. Silly to think, but I truly thought I needed everything figured out. So, I’ve thought and kept thinking about it.
Ultimately, it went nowhere… except around and around in my head.
It’s unfortunate but, at the same time, it allowed me to think round and round, which made me hyper-focus and develop the world I had in my head.
I’ve created, built, and developed a world I would like to see one day. And one day, I hope I see my characters come to life through words, my readers’ imaginations, and maybe film… maybe. It feels real to me so I hope it feels real to readers too.
I’m really proud of the world I’ve built and the characters I’ve made.
One of the other reason why I never officially started is because I wasn’t confident enough in myself to admit that this was my dream/goal of mine - to write and publish a book.
I’ve kept this goal of mine very close to me and my heart thinking no one would accept it or take me seriously… Stemming from a younger me who was judged and slightly scolded for writing imaginary scenes and stories that popped into my head.
Since I was a high schooler, I’ve had the dream to become an author - a dream I’ve acquired after reading so many young adult series like: Harry Potter, Twilight, The Hunger Games, The Golden Compass and Chronicles of Narnia. I loved the fact that with only words, they transported me to a whole different world and let my imagination blossom.
That dream grew in me until certain things happened and the confidence in me left… But just because I wasn’t confident didn’t mean I wasn’t writing.
I kept writing through undergrad and grad - always taking courses on fiction and creative writing, even if it wasn’t required. I wrote in my own time, privately keeping documents and writing down all the ideas that came to me.
And after a little bit of time, I think I’m finally ready and willing to commit.
I’ve come to realize that everyone has an odd journey when it comes to writing stories. For some people, it comes more naturally - going in chronological order. For me, in scattered plots and scenes but, they’re truly worth developing and putting into the world. So why keep it all in my head?
I have more confidence in myself and I believe in myself.
So I am going to write a book and document my journey writing here. I’m writing a fantasy book that might be more an epic with romance interlaced. I hope it’ll be a duology but I think it’ll be more of a trilogy.
I’m not sure if I want to traditionally publish it, but for now, I’m going to outline my timeline and get in the habit of writing every day, dedicating my time for this to come true.
This will be a long-term adventure I’m happy to go on, approximately taking 1-2 years, and I truly hope it becomes my career :)
That felt like a bold statement. But someone told me to speak everything into existence, so I think I’ll just leave it there and see what happens.
Thank you for reading all the way down here if you have! This post is much longer than I anticipated, but I had a lot on my chest (which most got cut out since it wasn’t necessary).
Aspiring Author,
A. Violet
p.s. apologies if I have any grammatical mistakes or typos.. I re-read this a lot but I don’t think I can fix it more
